Not Another Knitwit

Not Another KnitWit

Ok... I'm getting back on a plane. I will be in the Boston Area until Monday afternoon.. I'm really hopeful that I can get a good deal of stuff done while I'm at the meeting.. I've got my notebook all packed with lots of ideas already jottted down.. we'll se what happens.

Started school again yesterday. It was really nice being back on campus... As much as I was beginning to hate things last semester I think I'm going to be just fine this fall. I think that it was mearly a bad case of burnout. I have to remember that if the choice is between graduating early/on-time or taking one more year to do it and coming out of the process much more sane, to take the one more year option. I've only been to one of my classes so far, don't have the other two until monday and tuesday. Yay for night classes. All in all I think that taking the summer off was the best think I could have done for my school life.

But I have to go and make sure I'm not forgetting anything before I leave.

Loves

Not Another KnitWit

So I've finally broken the curse of not having a job. I got the call yestereday that the job I interviewed for last week would like to hire me. It's definatly a part time job at around 10 to 15 hours a week at Michigan Computer Supply Inc. in downtown Ann Arbor. But campared to the 0 hours at no company that I've been dealing with for the past 2 months. I've been on cloud nine for most of the day.

In knitting news I finished the first of Donald's Fuzzyfeet. I got my slipper bottoms for them from Elann with my last order. They've turned out well so far but this will be the first time I've felted anything so I'm hoping that I don't get them done only to have to start over again because I messed up the felting.

I've finally figured out the problem that I've been having with pictures and trying to post them to the site is related to the way the Donald has some of the server settings set up. So we are in the process of trying to figure all of that out but I have a ton of pictures to put up on here.

Thats really all I've got for now... with any luck the picture problem will be fixed before long.

My Grandmother's funeral was today. I am half still in shock and half of me is screaming inside. I haven't really gone more then two hours throughout the day without bursting into tears. Everyone just keeps trying to tell me to remember the life that she lived and that she was full of up until the last. And all I can do is curse and rail in my head all the things that she was supposed to wait for. I just want to sit in a corner and let the world pass me by and dwell in my grief but I know that the people who love me aren't going to let me do that. I'm so sick of being reserved and trying not to make too much of a big deal out of it but I can't do it anymore, I can't stop the tears even if I wanted to they keep flowing as my statement to the world that I'm not ok an things are't just fucking peachy. The funeral was at the huge catholic church that my grandmother was a part of and I think that if anything being there in that place was just as traumatic for me as her death itself. They were not my people, and I was not being spirtually served and I was so mad that I was there and I was so wrapped up in my grief that I barely remember half of what happened. It was all so ritiualistic and unemotional. I'm having a crisis of faith, a crisis of self, and most of all a crisis of what I'm doing with my life. I need to get some sleep now.. I've been little more then a walking zombie all day and I doubt that the next week or so is going to be any better. I'm trying to focus on other things but I can't for very long and the thought of getting back to "normal" is not something I've even been able to contemplate yet. But I have to go in and take a test tomorrow and then act like everything is find and I'm not a complete quivering mass of fear and insecruity on the inside. It's time to put the shell of normal back on and paint on the veneer that tells the world that I'm ok. But I still don't know if I can...

So I've been having a rough two weeks here. And I just have to say thank you to all of the people who have supported me in the last couple of week, and helped me to stay the course even when I just wanted to run screaming and curl up in a corner. That being said, the rest of this week has gone pretty well. I went back to school and got myself caught up after missing a couple of days. Went back to work and after a rocky 5 minutes (a phone message got lost) it was all good and I'm back to being the queen of empty toner cartriges.

But all in all that wasn't really the point of my post... In the midst of my grief and coming to terms with the new way that my world looks.. I've decided to go and get one of my tattoos done. I haven't decided where I want it yet but I'm going to go and get a red tulip in memory of my grandma. It just seems fitting that spring was always her favorite time of year and tulips were some of her favorite flowers. As long as I can remeber there was a planter box at the top of her stairs that held faux red tulips and it always seemed like a little touch of spring in the house, even if there was 2 feet of snow on the ground. So anyone who has suggestions on where to put it or where to go to get it done, feel free to comment...

In an attmept to enliven this blog with things relavant to knitting again, I finished the back piece to my litebrite sweater. As soon as some things settle down here at Chez Knitwit I'll get some pictures up so you can see the progress!

ok, well I have to go back and do some work now.. look me up, take me out, or just email me.. I'm feeling kind of disconnected...

One more week until school starts and then no more unlimited days of knitting. The good news is though that I have a couple of huge lecture classes that it shouldn't be a big deal if I have a couple of small projects with me. I can't find my camera at the moment so no pictures this post. I'm about half way through a sweater for DH and ready to start the edging on a blanket for my mom's cousin who just had twins. This is blanket one of two. Once I get done I'm going to have to decide if the blankets are going to be fraternal or identical twins. I think that they might be fraternal twin blankets given the amount of yarn that I have got in the various colors. Anyways... I'm going to and use the precious study free days to knit some more!!!!